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On the morning of the 27th we should arrive in Barcelona, lord willing and the creek won't rise. Upon getting to Barcelona, the works of Gaudi are on the tops of our list, and the following attractions as well.



Automation Museum - Early 20th-century coin-operated funfair automata laugh and wink and jerk about creepily. One of the world's best collections of antique robots is kept in pristine condition, down to the slightest detail: luscious costumes, lifelike faces, real hair and--most important--humanoid movements. Complicated scenarios are acted out on command, exactly as they have been for almost a century. Just being in the room with these mechanical golems will give you the chills ... and then they clank into action.

Bullfight Museum - The bulls remembered here were famous fighters in their time, and just look at the thanks they get. Now their taxidermed heads line the wall, ears lopped off long ago for trophies. Amid a panoply of bullfighting, memorabilia, mannequins model matadors' skintight, sequin-studded costumes, complete with pompommed slippers--just right for a long, drawn-out slaughter.

Erotic Museum - All this museum's scholarly pretensions regarding world anthropology and art history can't conceal what this is: a collection of artworks and gadgets whose focus, whose thesis, whose raison d'etre is getting it on--with oneself and with others. Sexy postcards from the 1920's depict big-butted models. Ancient Greek and Roman artifacts are decorated with those ubiquitously uncircumcised erections. A section on Asian erotica might inspire some visitors to go home and read the Kama Sutra after investing in a hefty set of ben-wa balls and a nice big bag of cucumbers.

Hearse Museum - Take a vicarious ride down memory lane to the melancholy pageantry of Barcelona funerals. Horse-drawn carriages and other kinds of hearses tell one side of the city's history over the past hundred years, with each vehicle providing clues about the age, class and status of its former passengers. From little kids to aristocrats, these bygone corpses' final journeys are easy to imagine after you've seen this collection, assembled by the municipal hearse service.

Illuminated Fountain Show - Candy-colored jets of water leap dozens of feet into the air from a circular fountain the size of several swimming pools. Designed as a set of concentric circles by Gaieta Buigas, the fountain commands a place of honor on the hill. To the amplified sounds of live music, brilliant red, orange, yellow, green and blue spumes play against each other against the blackness of a night sky and the pale domes of the National Palace. All the angst of a long summer day in the city dissolves as huge cool jets of turquoise and lemon rise and throb to the beat of a drum.

Perfume Museum - A bottle designed by Salvador Dali and crowned with a surrealistic sun is among 5,000 choice perfume vessels spanning thousands of years. Begun by a perfumer and now one of the world's largest of its kind, the collection includes hundreds of glass and ceramic flasks from ancient Greece, Rome and Egypt. Trace the histories of famous brands like Dior and Guerlain through their bottles and labels. Inspect flacons once owned by Marie Antoinette, and hark back to the times when water was rare in Europe and bathing rarer, and perfume was the way to keep one's lovers from gagging.

Shoe Museum - Hundreds of years' worth of shoes, and boots to boot, are lodged in the medieval headquarters of the Old Master Shoemakers' Guild. Genuine antique footwear dates back to the 16th century, with reproductions filling in around the edges. The shoes of Pablo Casals are among pairs formerly worn by famous performers. Outsizing the rest by far is the gigantic metal shoe made for a statue of Christopher Columbus, which only begs the question of whether it's true what they say about men with big feet.